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"Are you sure you want to do this? Because this could be the last time you will have a choice-about anything," I said. I meant it too. For as long as we stayed together, I wanted her to understand what she was getting into. We had talked about it plenty, but that was in the abstract. Now it was going to be real.
Lara knelt before me, dressed in a simple white blouse and skirt. I could see her nipples poking into the thin material. I could guess that her pussy was wet underneath her dark blue skirt. I knew how much this turned her on.
"Yes, sir."
"No, I don't want you to simply say, 'yes, sir'. That's too easy. I want to hear from your heart. What you really think. Explain yourself."
She looked up, her short brown hair framing her pretty face. "I've always wanted to live this way. My husband doesn't understand. He thinks I'm sick, perverted."
Looking away from me she continued. "It was something inside me I had tried to keep in. I thought it was wrong somehow. Only later, when I began reading about others online, did I realize I wasn't alone. That I wasn't a sick pervert." She looked down, blinking back tears, and I knew the idea that she would finally be allowed to live out her fantasy meant a lot to her.
Lara brought her face up again and I could see tears shining in her eyes. "I know it's not going to be easy all the time. I know you're going to demand things of me or punish me, and I'll be scared and maybe sometimes I'll think I'm being pushed too far. But this is what I want to do. It frightens and excites me at the same time."
"You agree to put yourself completely in my hands? No matter what I ask?"
"Yes. I trust you completely."
I nodded. "I know. Of course, there will be a safeword. I realize you probably won't ever need it. But I think it's important to have one. There may be times when you feel overwhelmed and need a break. The safeword will also be a hand gesture, in case you can't speak at the time." I smiled at the thought of that, and Lara closed her eyes briefly, her imagination working around that as well.
"The safeword will be Charlie." I smiled as she grimaced. Charlie was Lara's husband, technically speaking. They'd separated and had agreed they could each "see other people", though I don't think Charlie was aware of my existence, which suited me fine. I'd heard enough about him to make me think never was soon enough for us to meet.
The ostensive point of their separation was to try and decide if they should make the separation final or give the relationship another go. After six months though, Lara was the one who had filed for divorce, over Charlie's protest. Charlie was more interested in making it work than Lara was, but not because he loved her. She hadn't come out and said it in such a stark way, but I am a keen observer of others and have an intuitive understanding of other men's behavior. I believed he wanted her around because she was convenient, doing all the cooking, keeping the house, paying the bills and generally keeping their lives afloat while also holding down a job as a freelance journalist. Also, I think he was scared-scared to be alone and scared to give up what he was used to, even if he did think she was a "sicko perv".
Back to the present, I added, "That way, if you ever use it, I'll know you're serious. And I also know it will quickly kill the mood and get us back to our senses."
She grinned and nodded, her eyes wide.
"And the hand gesture will be this," I said, opening and closing my right hand, spreading fingers wide, then making a fist. "Either hand. Whichever one you might have free at the time."
Lara blushed. "Yes, sir."
"All right. We're not going to have a formal contract or any of that bullshit. This is just between you and me. The rules will be simple. When you're working on a story you're 'off duty'. But as soon as you walk in that door, you're my submissive slut, my little slave. Understand?"
She nodded eagerly. "Yes, sir."
"You may call me sir or master. Of course, you can always just call me Michael. I will call you whatever I want. It might be 'Lara' or it might be 'cunt' or 'slut' or 'whore'. As we've discussed on many occasions, these aren't derogatory terms in our secret language, but terms that remind you of what you are and who you belong to."
"Yes, Michael." Lara understood that those words, normally used as insults, were designed not only to remind her of her place, but to exalt her as a sexual submissive.
"You know I've lived a rather vanilla life before now. Yes, I've played in the BDSM, but I've never taken being a Dom to a higher level. Unlike some of my pals, for me it was really more of a game. Maybe I never found the right person. I've dated a lot of women in my thirty-four years, but no one ever seemed right for me. When I met you, I realized what I had been looking for." I paused, careful to put this next part in the right words. "As I've shared with you online, I've dabbled at the game of bondage and discipline with randy little slut girls at play parties. But that's all it ever was really-a game. I'm not a professional at this. But I think I'm finally ready at this point in my life and with you, Lara, to explore my dominant impulses, and help you explore your submissive ones. I don't claim to have all the answers, I just know what I want.
"This means-and this is important-that I will be experimenting as I go. Sometimes I might make mistakes. Sometimes I might go too far. Sometimes I might not be in the mood. I want you to understand I'm not going to meet all of your expectations all of the time. Sometimes you might think I'm going too easy on you, or too hard on you. The way I see it, that's too bad. If you want to do this, understand it won't be about you anymore. Your desires no longer matter. If you are going to be my submissive, you have to realize that by giving up control today, you also give up your right to be satisfied or to have all your needs met."
I stepped close and raised her chin until she was looking deep into my eyes. "Of course, the lovely irony is, as a sub this will, in fact, meet your needs. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir. I do."
"All right." I stepped back. "Do you agree, then?"
She took a deep breath. I could see her nipples were hard points under the thin blouse. "Yes, sir. I agree. I want to experience life as your submissive." |
