These past two weeks on this deserted island with the handsome stranger who had saved his life had literally turned his world upside down. Things he’d taken for granted had been ripped away from him. Together they’d been forced to forge a life, to find food and make shelter, each moment a small miracle as they made it through another day. Though Donovan still hoped they would be rescued, a part of him had thrived as he found himself able to rise to each task before them.
Had he been observing himself from outside the situation, the Donovan of two weeks before would have said he was now acting off his fear and loneliness. With an attorney’s logical mind, he would have told himself any person would be drawn to the only person left in his world. He would have assured himself his attraction to Sam didn’t mean he was gay or even curious. It didn’t mean anything at all.
These past days with endless hours to contemplate his life, his fate, his future, his desires, his dreams—had stripped away much of the old logical veneer he used to pride himself on applying to all situations. He and Sam didn’t know if they’d ever make it off this tiny bit of land—at once a paradise and a prison. He did know he respected and admired the quiet self-assured Sam, but beyond that, he desired him. He wanted to find out what was behind those large dark eyes, what really went on in Sam’s head and heart. He longed to know if he had a place there.
He could feel Sam tremble as he moved closer, their bare chests touching. Donovan closed his eyes, barely able to believe he was kissing a man! He could feel his cock bending and rising in his underwear, his balls tightening with lust. Sam pulled away as Donovan instinctively moved forward, his mouth still eager for Sam’s kiss. He opened his eyes, a sigh of dismay escaping his lips.
Sam’s eyes were bright, his expression full of pain. “Don’t do this, Donovan,” he said tightly. “Whatever you’re doing, stop it.”
“What? You don’t want to…” Donovan trailed off, flames of embarrassment licking his face as he turned away. His miscalculation hit him in the gut like a fist. Sam had no interest in him—Sam didn’t want him.
“Jesus, you know that’s not it!” Sam’s voice was sharp, pain echoing in his words.
Donovan turned back toward him, confused. “Of course I want to! I’ve wanted nothing but since I first saw you on the ship! Don’t you see—if you start this, I can’t go back. If you break down the fragile defense I’ve managed to maintain, I don’t think I can build it up again. Once you’re done ‘experimenting’ or whatever the hell it is you’re doing, and you’re ready to go back to being mister straight man, I’m not going to be able to just turn it off. I’m not wired like that. For me it’s all or nothing.
Do you understand? I can’t do this. There’s too much at stake between us. We have to live together, just us. There’s nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide.”
Donovan was confused but at the same time felt hope rising like a lark inside him. His voice pleading, he said, “But I don’t want to hide! I’ve wanted to kiss you forever. I have to find out if what I feel is real. I know you feel it too.” Donovan glanced at Sam’s underwear to make his point—the erection still visible despite his protestations.
“Of course I feel it! Damn it, that’s the point! For you this is a game, for me it’s real, all too real. If you kiss me again, I’m not going to be able to stop. I’m going to take you all the way, Donovan. I only play for keeps.”
Donovan stared at the man standing nearly naked before him. They were the only people in the world at that moment. His decision would shape the course of their lives—at least until they were rescued. If they were rescued. He touched his lips, the heat of Sam’s mouth still imprinted there. He wanted another kiss. He wanted more than that. For the first time in his life, Donovan ached for the experience held just out of his reach.
Moving toward Sam, he whispered, “Kiss me.”
With those two words, Sam’s barely contained reserve fell away. He focused a moment on Donovan’s masculine chest, the nipples red against the black curling chest hair. He longed to take advantage of what he feared was only loneliness and misplaced lust. He looked up into Donovan’s eyes, taking his measure one last time before he abandoned himself to his desires. Donovan’s expression was hungry, his lips parted, his azure eyes flickering with anticipation as he held Sam’s gaze.
Even as he moved closer, even as he took Donovan’s face in his hands and pulled him down to claim his mouth, Sam feared he would regret this. Yet the stark need of the moment overwhelmed him as their lips touched. Unable to contain himself any longer, he actually moaned against Donovan’s mouth, his fingers gliding up into Donovan’s silky dark hair as he held him fast.
The kiss was not gentle. It was not a tentative exploration or the delicate touch of new lovers. The tide of lust held back so long burst forth as tongue met tongue, winding and curving together in wet heat as masculine chests met, as flat bellies were held apart by the erect cocks nestling vertically side by side, barely contained in the cotton underwear each man still wore. They sank down in slow motion to wet sand, each up on his knees as if in prayer, the object of his worship held in his arms.
Sam held Donovan fast, determined to take his pleasure at Donovan’s sweet mouth, exploring its warmth with his tongue, nibbling the full lower lip, gliding his tongue along strong white teeth, his fingers twisting in Donovan’s thick hair, his cock grinding against his belly.
Slow down, slow down… he tried to tell himself, knowing he was moving too fast, knowing he was going to scare the man away before they’d even begun. Forcing himself to back off, he pulled away, steeling himself for Donovan’s possible rejection even now.
Donovan was breathing hard, his chest rising and falling, his eyes bright in the darkening purple of twilight. “What happens now?” he asked softly.
|
